(Note: For those of you that don't know, this blog started out as a Facebook page called "Changing my life one month at a time". My life was in a rut and I had had some seriously dark days. I woke up one day and decided I had had enough of living like I was waiting for each day to end in hopes that the next would be better. So I started a journal and set monthly goals for myself to accomplish what would, hopefully, be the baby steps I needed in order to make some big changes in my life. I did awesome for the first three months and then, in true Christina fashion, I started making excuses. Cue the following rant.)
So, we're at this once again. I did what I always do - I sabotaged myself. I failed to do the one thing I most wanted to do - prove to myself that I could follow through with something. I started this thing wanting to accomplish a years worth of monthly goals. I completed three months. I did follow through with some of my other monthly goals, but I didn't stick to my timeline and I didn't complete every goal I set out to.
So, we're at this once again. I did what I always do - I sabotaged myself. I failed to do the one thing I most wanted to do - prove to myself that I could follow through with something. I started this thing wanting to accomplish a years worth of monthly goals. I completed three months. I did follow through with some of my other monthly goals, but I didn't stick to my timeline and I didn't complete every goal I set out to.
I had a talk with my husband tonight because lately, I've been feeling that dark cloud hanging over my head again. What I came to realize from this conversations was that those three months were the happiest months I've had this year. I felt amazing, looked amazing and didn't have a single dark day. I was accomplishing something and it was doing wonders for my body and mind. Where I started to lose control I couldn't tell you. But usually my excuse is that things got too difficult and it was easier to make excuses than to push through.
I feel that I should explain something. Now, I don't know how everyone else deals with life or how they manage to push through the rough patches because everyone is different. However, I am unfortunate enough to have something called PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). This is something that causes a hormonal imbalance in women (among many other things). I have all of the usual symptoms, but it seems the one that hits me the hardest is depression. I have really hi hi's and incredibly low lows. Now I know what you're probably thinking, "Christina, why not just go to your doctor and get him to prescribe you something?". For those of you that know me personally, you know that I hate (and I mean HATE) being on any kind of medication. I know that modern medicine is an incredible thing and has absolutely done wonders for people - but if there is a way for me to do something naturally instead of popping a pill, I'll choose the natural way. For me it was changing my relationship with food, educating myself on what goes in to the food we eat and adapting a healthier, more natural diet that did the trick. This was one goal I wanted to maintain not just for a month or a year, but for the rest of my life.
I feel that I should explain something. Now, I don't know how everyone else deals with life or how they manage to push through the rough patches because everyone is different. However, I am unfortunate enough to have something called PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). This is something that causes a hormonal imbalance in women (among many other things). I have all of the usual symptoms, but it seems the one that hits me the hardest is depression. I have really hi hi's and incredibly low lows. Now I know what you're probably thinking, "Christina, why not just go to your doctor and get him to prescribe you something?". For those of you that know me personally, you know that I hate (and I mean HATE) being on any kind of medication. I know that modern medicine is an incredible thing and has absolutely done wonders for people - but if there is a way for me to do something naturally instead of popping a pill, I'll choose the natural way. For me it was changing my relationship with food, educating myself on what goes in to the food we eat and adapting a healthier, more natural diet that did the trick. This was one goal I wanted to maintain not just for a month or a year, but for the rest of my life.
I started these goals as a way to better myself for me and for my family. They deserve me at my best and so do I. I wouldn't say that I'm starting at square one again because a few good things came out of those successful three months. I am proud to say that I have remained meat free since March 1st and I have also taken up Yoga in my living room (lord help the poor souls that walk by and see me doing downward dog). I have educated myself (and continue to educate myself) on what goes in to the food we eat and it has allowed me (for the most part) to make healthier choices for myself and for my family. I'm not sure how I'm going to go about it this time around, but I know that whatever changes I make will be for the better and I look forward to meeting that happy Christina in the very near future.
I want to keep you guys updated on how things are progressing here and what changes I making. It helps knowing that there are people out there rooting for me.
I want to keep you guys updated on how things are progressing here and what changes I making. It helps knowing that there are people out there rooting for me.
"Remember how far you've come, not just how far you have to go. You are not where you want to be, but neither are you where you used to be"
- Rick Warren
- Rick Warren
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